Quantum Entanglement (A Love Story)

Marijuana has helped, but I'm not sure how much. It certainly made periods of insomnia livable, and depression more bearable.

Did it also help re-wire? My instinct is that yes, it did, because it directed my train of thought often enough -- which I feel was a catalyst.

I made a post in the math/philosophy forum about 10 years ago. I will try and find it someday maybe. The jist was I made a declaration to sit in stillness and think rigorously, allowing my entire life so much as to pass me by, as I worked out the mechanics of my mental illness.

That's more or less what I did. Someone quote replied and said, "Big Gamble." I guess in a way it was.

all my collusion and wound up with nothing :(

It was a tragic end for you....done dirty by some guy on the Pirates.

I've got a lot of Radiohead to listen to. Thom Yorke/"The Smile", and I haven't even heard A Moon Shaped Pool.

Little things in the future I look forward to.

It's 3:30AM.

It's zero-hour for my newest war with Insomnia, this time with a spice of Las Vegas.

Got a few mins of sleep. Maybe 60. A good trend is starting...

Possibly meeting up with a buddy for lunch at Venetian.

Thoughts of self-exclusion from the sports books ruminate around my head. It's somehow more of a problem than not that I can occasionally read the tea leaves accurately.

It's best that I don't ever bet. I'm a low stakes poker player, not some gambling wizard.

In the magazines,
On the big screen,
No matter where you are you might hear me.

Venetian and Wynn are the best casinos if you like things that are nice. They also happen to have Poker.

They said the new room at Palazzo would be an unmitigated disaster. It's actually quite nice. Royal Blue is a better color scheme than Burnt Red or however you might describe the old room. The tables are now state of the art and about the same as Wynn's. The air quality is first rate, and self-serve drinks are good for us nits. Both Wynn and Venetian are a pleasure to enter - which is very important to the flow state - Palazzo has The Sphere, the last thing you'll see of the outside world before going in to a ritzy mall. Encore/Wynn is like walking into a palace, with a huge red carpet from front door to room. Best drinks are at The Wynn, best food service probably Venetian.

Phenomenal post.

Walking through the Venetian is a surreal experience.

I'm sitting on a 2nd story balcony facing The Sphere, smoking great weed, reflecting upon the last few days.

I said 'goodbye' to my friend's condo today and moved in at The Orleans for the next 8 days.

He has a rescue Italian Mastiff which seemed batshit insane and gave me tons of anxiety, to the point that it was affecting my poker volume.

I'm going to play a lot of poker now 😀

I'm out $1,000 in hotel costs :(

I'm going to log my results in this thread (?!)

- Because I might not be playing much live poker again for a long time. This trip will be the Trumpet to my Swan Song, and you all will have to suffer. Immensely. For the next 8 days.

The Lions are on Monday Night Football starting shortly and I might watch it up in my room. But, in case you are wondering, my undertitle also refers to Amon-Ra St. Brown -- the heartbeat of The Detroit Football Lions.

Go Lions.

Go go good luck😀

Thanks Stu 😀

I'm sitting in The Orleans poker room watching the end of a baseball game. I don't think I have enough energy to play my A-game tonight, so I'm just gonna chill out. There's a gas station across the street with snacks just beyond a field of prostitutes.

I'm pondering the outcomes of making an AMA thread - overcoming mental illness edition. Mike Haven mentioned to me that it could be a cool idea.

Reasons to not:
- I know very little about psychiatry outside of my own experience.
- My condition wasn't inherited and is rather a-typical, so who knows if my posts could help anyone.
- I have to do some mental gymnastics when digging through my memories of being sick. It is very much like looking back at a fever dream. And without the evidence of 10s of thousands of mentally ill posts and recorded interactions, I'd probably feel fraudulent.
- There's just not that much content that I can solely provide.
- I might not be able to answer many questions, mostly for "not knowing" than being shy.

Reasons to do:
- I'm not sure.
- It could help someone.
- It could be fun.
- I am a good explainer of things.
- 2p2 could use the action.
- Mike Haven is in fact more wise than I.

To my vast collection of readers:

Would any of you, who have been diagnosed, like to do an AMA with me? I think this would be the best way to do it actually, with a few unique stories and points of view on a panel type setting.

Also, if you have any input on this post above, please chime in below with your opinion.

Travel the world
Traverse the skies
Your home is here
Within my heart...

And for the first time
I feel as though I am
Reborn in my mind
Recast as child and mystic sage

Who wouldn't be the one you love?
Who wouldn't stand inside your love?

And for the first time
I'm telling you how much I need
And bleed for
Your every move and waking sound
In my time
I'll wrap my wire around your heart
And your mind
You're mine forever...

Insomnia followed me to The Orleans and might derail this whole trip. I barely got 2 hours of sleep and that was after smoking a joint in the parking lot.

I played a 2 hour session around 6am. The game was good and I was up $2 thinking of quitting. And then I picked up QQ....

EP: raise to $6
Hero MP: $31
EP: call

Kd Jd 6x

EP: Check
Hero: $25
EP: Call

5x

EP: Check
Hero: Check

Qx

EP: Check
Hero: $35 (?!?)
EP: Seems to reluctantly call

I fastroll QQQ. He turns over:

KKK

Ahahaha. I could have conceivably bet up to a full jam on the river busting me. Instincts said bet small. I think I played it well.

The one thing I get to look forward to the most when I play at my local card room, after of course folding AKs and TT+ to any early position raise from the old man sitting around the table, is watching how hesitant people are to show their cards when it goes to showdown.

I would think they were just slow rolling me when I flipped over my top two and they sheepishly rolled over bottom set, but I guess when my opponents are not almost falling asleep, or reading the paper, the truth is they may actually be a little nervous. Been a while since I played, so maybe it’s changed. I doubt it.

Your play though - maybe a little results oriented? Worked out anyways, I def would have lost more.

Maybe a tad R.O.

I thought I should have some frequency of several bet sizes, figured 1/3p some of the time can't be too bad. Had some reasons too but they aren't that important - I was clicking buttons 😀 😀 😀

Nah not exactly clicking buttons, they can raise weaker hands like 2p and call a lot for that price.

Are you gonna check out other places too? How did you do on that session btw overall?

I sometimes play at The Wynn and Venetian, and I'm banned from The Bellagio.

That session ended after the set over set spot. I was on no sleep and it was 8am so it made sense to snap sit out.

I played an afternoon session today. Very first hand I hero'd 44 on KT522 for +$85, then chipped up slowly while everyone around me played face up.

(Wednesday) I played 3am-5 and netted $80. Was in for $720 following me butchering a spot badly with black kings on T73dsJhhh (ran into 32s haha). I then went on to win several medium sized pots with the middle of my value ranges. I saw enough poor play that after 350 hrs grinding Orleans games I can without a doubt declare it the softest $1/3 in town. Anyone who says different doesn't know what they're talking about, or they are afraid of variance.

If you're a small time player, You have to like playing poker in order to stay on property in las vegas. I don't mean making money (as to why they like it), because the hotel rates are so bad relative to small stakes winnings that you are generally looking at losing trips after expenses.