Bodybuilding Classic Physique Division Offseason log

Semi deload sesh. Decided against doing a conventional block for a month and just stick to paused SLDLs. Maybe after prep is over try some fiddling around with conventional. I was really exhausted after last week being basically max effort on my sldls. I'm considering making the rest of the training week a deload as well and then pushing hard the last 3 weeks before the diet starts.

Appetite is doing exceedingly well despite being near the end of the offseason and indulging in some less than perfectly clean foods (ribeye, lanzhou la mian, Dairy Queen)

Arms+Lower

Cable curls: 21.25x31, 17, 14
pushdowns: 32.25kgx22, 11, 13
dual handle facing away cable curls: 8.75kgx15, 12, 13
db skullcrushers: 10kgx19, 11, 9

Leg extensions: 40.25kgx22, 11, 13
Seated ham curl: 70kgx16, 11
paused sldl: only up to 100kgx10
lying ham curl: 39kgx12

Anti-emo smugness:

Hooolllyyy **** I get on instagram and find some people from high school's profiles. JFC I had no idea how good I have it. I am lifemogging everyone harder than I could have ever imagined. Fatties everywhere. Fat husbands. FAt wives. No lifting. Ugly kids. Single Moms. Non college requiring jobs. Probable celibacy. Alternative to celibacy often times even more disgust inducing.

I actually feel a sense of triumph at first but then something between pity and disgust. I can't imagine what it would be like going through life being fat with a fat wife and not ****ing or being a fat single mom cutting hair all day long. Here I am worried about stupid ass bullshit like pro cards and coaching careers and being a principal and fixing schools b/c everyone around me doesn't udnerstand anything about the country they live in. Playing with house money lmao, don't worry about that **** just have gratitude and watch some dune with mandarin Dub.

The interview is tomorrow and I don't think I really want this job. I don't know if I can keep living here for another possibly 3 years on top. I do have the bare minimum of groceries+excellent gym, but there's still a sense of isolation here I can't shake. It's like we exist in some parallel Chinese mini-colony seperate from the rest of the country with its own divergent laws, lifestyle, and cultural practices. Actually I just described in very literal terms the place where I live. I have this perpetual feeling of "wanting to go home" I can't shake... I'll try my hardest on the interview and see what #s we're talking about.... if it's in the low six figs USD I'll absolutely continue the isolation for a bit. If not, I need to finish up my 2 years and move on....

I'm also really ****ing sick of this British ceremonial ****. They treat education like it's the ****ing Catholic church. A whole lot of rituals and not a lot of actual ****ing teaching and learning. The obsession with titles and hierarchies and student councils and meetings and using email instead of wechat for vital time sensitive communication. **** this **** I'm a Chinese at my core I am sick of these people. And while most Chinese colleagues are great, about 30% have become intolerable from being so British-ized.

Go to another Chinese owned school plz...

So a few thoughts on this:

1) It is relatively easy to smugly look down on these folks, but many are happy (or unhappy) and comfortable with their state in life. Granted I likely will never interact with any of these people and don't really care. However, have some casual awareness of their level of social/personal development and where you stand in the hierarchy is beneficial. I've frequently been accused of being arrogant and "thinking I'm better than other people", but in reality I know I'm better than other people.

On a side anecdote, I have a dog who is kinda ****** (as all small children and pets are wont to be), but it isn't necessary to flex on him and his inability to do basic things IE back up far enough to jump onto a thing. Instead I help him and I view many normies like this as well. They're to be pitied and helped instead of scorned. Granted many of them are deserving of scorn and do receive it on occasion.

2) Dude, just move if you don't like it. You create your own world (environment, friends, etc) and can affect this in any way you wish. If you think the juice is worth the squeeze, great. But it increasingly sounds like it doesn't.

3) The weird British **** sounds abhorrent.

In totality, I'm very happy for you and what you've achieved. Not really in a sense of arbitrary goals, since I could give two ****s if you get a pro card or not. But you seem to have a good idea of who you are and who you want to be and the various paths that are offered to you in life. This is more than the vast majority of people who are even afforded that opportunity can say. When I was younger I used to exude much more of this smug satisfaction, but as I've gotten older much more joy is derived from when haters have to deal with the cognitive dissonance of larger accomplishments all coming at them at once. (See any of the myriad 2+2 haters who can't seem to grasp that I've made **** you money and am happily married.) I recently got a wedding thank you card from a close friend (also a 2p2 n00b) who wrote "I don't know how you did it". Neither do I, but somehow we're here. And you are well on your way.

The UK school thing sounds like our private school system. I went to state school, so don't have a lot of experience with it; but it seems designed to produce smug cockwombles.

in my day to day life i'm regularly running into the normies at the betting kiosks, poker games and blackjack tables

not once have i ever felt like i'm a happier person than any of them - i'm incredibly jealous that i can't just have a 250 pound wife and go home from my punch in punch out job and happily watch young sheldon with the family and follow it up with a jeff dunham holiday special where we're all laughing out loud in unison while eating the microwaved pizza we took out of the freezer

jeff dunham is the highest grossing comedian in the world, let that sink in

Maybe this is why I made it and you didn't?

That is objectively dick and I won't walk away from it, but maybe step back and think about this. I'm easily in the .1%> of people. Is it my skin color (light)? Is it my superior racial makeup (mixed)? Or was I just better than you? And not just better than you, I was so much ****ing better than you I can even write out a playbook for what I did that you are unable to even innovate on to get yours?

I hope this isn't disparaging. I hope it is inspiring. I'm literally a 40y old man drinking some weird variant of Makers wearing sweat pants listening to Yellow Card who is trying to inspire you to be a better version of you. I hope you read this and think "If this dumb **** can manage this, surely I can" which is what I hope you get out of this. And if you are wont to think I advise this to anyone, Guy can disabuse of that notion quite quickly. I was an early and vocal critic of his mental acumen to finish to an economics PhD (he could have finished, but yeah.... glhf).

In a more personal note: El D and I often talk about super smart people. I know a few. I'm sure all of you know a few people like this. They quote random particle physics theorems to you in casual convo. I'm not this bright. You probably aren't either. Just get "there" on your own and reach YOUR potential.

**** them kids, as they say.

so you think i should start eating hot pockets?

I lacked the IQ and raw talent, but I had the work ethic to where I probably would have gotten through it... and then proceeded to work a very low level Academic job at a crap university with ingrate students getting paid an amount that would represent a fairly significant hit to my lifetime earnings compared to having just continued working in industry with my master's. I probably had the mental acumen for something like law or medicine or phd in a softer field like psych, but econ/finance phds are on another level. And econ/finance is still another level below CS/maths/physics.... I was the top student in my master's not because I was smarter or more talented, but because I had a chip on my shoulder, felt I had something to prove, and had more motivation and was willing to work more for it than my peers. I think I also have a brain wired more for language; learning Chinese has felt much easier than even my master's in econ did. But I'm sure plenty of people from my cohort back then would have found the opposite because they just have brains more suited for quantitative tasks and abstraction.

But another reason I would discover later is that my opportunity cost for finishing econ/finance phd was much higher than I'd known at the time. It's probably flagrantly obvious that romantic/sex life is far more important to me than a normal human male my age. Choosing econ/finance phd is a good way to become an incel for your most prime dating years. All that dating and relationship experience was invaluable in figuring out how things work, and it'd be hard to imagine going through life without the first hand insights I gained in those years. And given my own parents failure to maintain a stable marriage, it was of extra importance for me to figure out how it all works.

If I were to go back in time to do a phd I would have gone into psychology and human mating behaviour, but in 2013 when I finished master's I had no idea that was even a field.

No regrets about not continuing down that life path, and yes, "Thremp was right".

Make me throw up in my mouth a little bit. But also highlight that two of the most important things about living life are what you choose to consume (both food and media) and your exercise habits.

Not trying to speak for rickroll (sorta), but I think it's more than he's jealous of how incredibly low their hedonic threshold is. The simplest and most ******ed things give them pleasure, but for people like us we just keep upping the ante. Hotter girls, better steaks, more interesting and fun vacations in Thailand, incapable of enjoying most (not all) popular entertainment. Things that are torturous and vomit inducing for us are literally like a really enjoyable Friday night for them. What if a person could find meaning, fulfillment, and external markers of success while maintaining such a low threshold for enjoyment? Although maybe something a bit healthier than frozen pizza and 250lbs wife, that'd be a person with a rare level of insight and wisdom. I'm working on becoming that guy who can step back and get out of his own way of enjoying his life and fully experience the simple pleasures instead of always wanting more while still reaching those external success markers and fulfilling their personal potential. Those external success markers are important, what people think of you is very important. It's coded into your dna to be important and people that say it isn't important are coping and virtue signaling. I imagine it'll be an ongoing continuous process.

There was this one woman who I knew back in middle and high school. She was very attractive then and actually very kind to me so it's not like a revenge of the nerds stereotype. She's the one who is now an obese single mom haircutter. She developed early and had a huge chest and flat stomach as early as 9th grade. She was from a more working class background and never attended a university. She is trying to do some makeup artistry but doesn't seem very good at it unfortunately so it's more of a hobby than a profession. This morning I was just thinking "holy ****... what if somebody like her got to eat the ribeye steak I made on Saturday or was able to hang out in Thailand with their mom during part of their 3 week vacation? She'd literally start crying...There is no reason I should feel unhappy at all I have sooooo much in life compared to people I grew up around and compared to the global population on average".

Just like thank ****ing god I can go to an air conditioned gym 4x/wk to lift weights in a planned systematic fashion to induce long-term physical adaptations and developed the skill to make balanced, nutritious, emotionally satisfying, and tasty food and to do so and bring it with me to work every single day.

It's wild to me that not everyone does this or that not everyone has the ability to do these two things.

I need to take the time to acknowledge that this alone seems ordinary, but its actually incredibly special and rare and gives me so much health, aesthetics, and happiness.

Superdrol out already I think. 10mg 4x/wk is too much. Very slight and tolerable nausea, but if I'm going to use any oral AAS while bulking I want any discomfort to be a 0/10 and I'd say it's around a 1.5/10 rn.

I might wait another week and try again at 5mg 4x/wk or use it on upper days 2x/wk 10mg only.

I am in a hurry so semi-grunching this conversation; but I think I get the 40,000 foot view. Obviously you are all male so there is still time; but while you guys are all pontificating about your own success and how you got there keep in mind from a biological perspective (AFAIK) you are all (so far, as I said still time) complete failures, who have failed to procreate and pass on your genes. And in the game of life this is how score is kept.

I actually came here to post this graph, as when I saw it it reminded me of a conversation you guys were having a few weeks ago, and how we might need to rethink who should have the right to vote.

Edit: I am having trouble loading the pic, but it basically shows how in the recent German elections young, single women are keeping the left wing parties on life support, while everyone else is shifting towards center/right.

I dont know how true this is, but there is actually in interesting psych evo explanation for this, given the main divide between the far left and everyone else is immigration.

For most of human history, population replacement went a specific direction. A rival tribe would defeat your tribe, kill everyone but breeding age females, and then take the breeding age females as mates. Genetic history confirms this is generally how things went (when a tribe is conquered genetic male genes go extinct and female genes continue)

So from a historical psych EV perspective the evolutionary outcomes of large scale immigration are better for young single females than everyone else.

This one?

Also, sick burn on those childless evolutionary dead ends!

thremp, still need to re-read everything you wrote again when not hungover later but like guy i this your misunderstood what i wrote because i was a little surprised by your response as it felt like it came out of left field

you're not wrong about what you wrote though - and yes, even though i'm doing objectively better than most people in usa or even most of the world, i still very much view where i'm at in life as not having made it to where i want to be

i too wasn't sure if you understand my initial post but guy absolutely nailed it in his better explaining that the jealousy in those situations is that i wish i could find the kind of happiness and joy that others can find

one of the most painful things in my existence is seeing others saying the stupidest things and all having the greatest time doing it

i spent a bunch of time in the ozarks last year - there was no greater hell for me than to be in a living room with a group of people all watching a jeff dunham special and not only finding his act pandering to the lowest bar but also wholly without any humor or context, everything is funny sounding voices which dumb people are entertained by - it's literally an adult doing an impression of kid's say the darndest things

and yet while watching this thing i find gross and demeaning, i turn and look, and literally everyone is laughing along and loving every minute of it - i wish i could have that, i wish something as base as jeff dunham did it for me

No way am I clicking that link. Gonna lower my already non-genius level IQ several points. I need to retain all I can so that Guy and Thremp will still actually talk to me.

I have produced three healthy ones and so have hopefully spread my genes further out there into the world. no grandchildren yet. posting because i also am aligned with your major point here. we are mammals and our genetic imperative is to breed and the rest is basically garnish

this is very interesting.

the female, male split in terms of left v right is not new but is growing in most western democracies. I put it down (with tongue partially in cheek) to women having been historically provided for and men historically being the provider and women therefore believing they are entitled to more free stuff from the state, therefore supporting higher taxes (on other people of course...not them) and greater gubmint spending than men who have historically had to do the providing and been self sufficient and therefore see less need for 'help' from the gubmint

i watched 20 seconds and have ragret

hahaha, you are 100% correct.

highest

grossing

comic

of

all

time

when i was forced to either watch it or be weirdly anti-social i often would think about whether jeff is like "is he in on it" and he's just following formula of success or is it something far, far uglier and troubling, that not only is that his genuine best efforts at humor but he somehow hit the very top of his range outcome and somehow was lucky enough to be born in the only version of earth out in the multiverse that would find such a massive audience that he can repeatedly sell out huge shows on tour

a mcdonald's burger is probably the biggest selling burger of all time

but i understand the people behind mcdonalds, i do not understand the man behind the puppets

But nobody is actually optimizing their life around this biological evolutionary perspective consciously. And by that metric, a guy in prison with 6 kids by 4 women he never married with 2 murders and 1 rape on his rap sheet serving a life sentence is more successful (in the game of life) than anyone we know. One of the major things that differentiates us from animals as humans is this separation between our conscious brain and our instinctual brain and the ability to use that conscious brain, override our instincts, and optimize for something other than biological evolutionary imperatives. We tend to optimize for "happiness", but even this ends up being extremely complex as figuring out how to do this is quite a battle where FPS is often the culprit for our failure to optimize as such.

But then sometimes you go full circle and say "fk it' and realize that trying to optimize for happiness is just going to send you into a spiral of overthinking and instead mostly just act on your gut and you somehow end up better off thinking less and doing more.

Just some data points among my family on mom's side

Cousin 1: Turbo obese, no college diploma at age 41 yet, working as a teaching assistant in an elementary school. lives with both her new boyfriend and ex-husband b/c nobody in this triangle can afford rent. 2 kids aged 9 and 3.

Cousin 2 (the one in China): Chunky and frail, but not obese. Bilingual, master's, social media star, just got paid $4k usd to do a 70 second car commercial and it took around 5 hours of labour. No kids never married 33. Very high level of musical, comedic, and artistic talent. Actually utilizes the last 2 in his daily life.

Cousin 3: Healthy weight and basic human strong. Bachelor's in education, second bachelor's later in life in CS. Married with 1 child aged 8. Actually a super talented actor trying to break into the business while working a remote IT job making around 150k/yr, but probably hopeless as he's a 40 year old white male with 0 connections.

Sister: Divorced, no kids, master's but it's in social work, 33. Skinny, frail, works as a counsellor focusing on non-monogamous couples and on LGBT stuff (I am not making this up...)

Cousin 4: Healthy weight and basic human strong. Married, bachelor's, wife is a lawyer, 1 child aged 2. 39 years old. Extremely normie. Everyone else has a lot of quirks and idiosyncrasies, but he's shockingly vanilla. He's living the life all of our parents wish we had lived, despite much lower income and status than his wife.

Cousin 5: 42, bald, skinny, and frail, law degree, multi-millionaire who got rich in non-btc crypto and mostly the axie infinity bubble. Retired incel living out in a cabin in the woods. We suspect he may be a virgin. No kids never married obv.

Yikes, we are not doing great as a clan. Line is definitely going to die out on my mom's side. Dad's side will be fine, no problem. Our most prolific child-haver is our worst in terms of health, education, and income. Our highest income highest educational attainment has possibly never even been inside them sugar walls in his early 40s. The two guys in China who could create robust high iq hybrid babies seem to preoccupied with indulging themselves and arbitrary career advancement to settle down and have kids.

I kinda wonder what impact advanced degrees and coming from a divorced family has on fertility. I'd expect in the case of divorced family, the impact is way larger than anyone would imagine and anyone who's not a total ****** who comes from a divorced family gets very scared off getting married and having kids while the ******s lack the insight to not directly emulate the dysfunctional model their parents gave them. I suspect that red pill grifters overplay how much getting an advanced degree lowers female fertility and I'm actually unsure what impact it has on males; it could very well be positive. I suspect law/medicine are positive, master's is around neutral, and phd is very negative.