Quantum Entanglement (A Love Story)
I think the Phillies are in big trouble. Selling them now lol. Buying the Mets. neutral on braves.
Feeling a bit more solid today than yesterday.
Sometimes I just don't have it and it doesn't take me long to figure that out.
It's pretty far from the end of the world when that happens. I have a tendency to zero in on micro aspects, its like the very top 1% of my psyche was trending townwards while the rest of me was totally fine.
The "bit" is the critical value. Any more and I would be some kind of *******. Any less I would have a lower standard of excellence.
I sort of walk a tightrope in that regard.
I'm not jealous of the people who are 100% or whatever every day. Or just have a strong electrical charge no matter what.
I think that would be slightly boring. There is an aspect of unpredictability when I wake up. There are also different 'modes' of thought. I tend to draw good conclusions from less-than places for example.
Plus I'm a moody artist and that is just how it's gotta be. There is color to my mood and indefinite shades. You might get 365 different versions of me a year.
Despite being downtrodden occasionally, I always bring a good spirit to the table for those around me.
Like my postings for example. I posted through treatment resistant bipolar disorder and autism for like 15 years. My posts were ugly and terrible long ago, but they started to improve and look where I am today.
Plus some of my old antics were surprisingly creative and wild. Just a net negative and not wanted of course, especially for moderators and frequent readers looking for more sincerity (it was like 2019 when I realized sincerity was the most important trait in terms of being liked by others.)
The day I realized telling the truth was actually way easier than lying is when I also started to accelerate my development.
Despite being severely mentally ill, despite having anger and rage like a very small version of Ted Bundy, despite having no real friends at one point, and despite having plenty of jealousy for my peers, and despite being a misfit on these very forums...
I still have a 100.00% perfect social credit in the gambling world. All transactions have been smooth and perfect. I've never once mis-respresented myself in any way to a serious gambler person. I take a ton of pride in this.
The idea of being scummy with money in any capacity just isn't in my nature.
The idea of cheating someone at cards, any version of cards, is a Capital crime in the spirit realm and will get you a one-way ticket to gambler's hell.
I even refunded half of the fees I charged a guy for coaching in 2009. He was happy to pay the full lot, but I felt the session wasn't as good as it could be and I felt obligated to return his money.
Journeyman54 . if he's still around.
When I play cards with my sister's friends I never go full speed against them. I don't have it in me to flip the serial-thriller switch and streamroll their game. I still win at a huge clip, but I don't push every edge like I do online.
Humble brag. I started with a $10 deposit on 12/29, and I have $135 in outstanding futures bets.
The compulsion to then show I am being honest is totally invalid. Everyone knows I'm not making up these bets.
Despite being severely mentally ill, despite having anger and rage like a very small version of Ted Bundy, despite having no real friends at one point, and despite having plenty of jealousy for my peers, and despite being a misfit on these very forums...I still have a 100.00% perfect social credit in the gambling world. All transactions have been smooth and perfect. I've never
I've now bumped fists (effectively) with two former world champions. I used to play Yahoo backgammon with a WSOP main event winner, and I also very briefly shared messages back and forth with a former Best HU NLHE Player In The World (actually two of them, but bragging about talking to Doug is hardly a brag).
I take a lot of pride in this.
You need to possess a great amount of mental flexibility to be a good poker player.
Situations are chaotic, and strategies change on the fly. You have to be an adaptor or you will fail.
Slow-rolling live is way worse than doing it online.
Because online is anonymous. There is no guttereal embarassment.
